How to gasp for air when your mind is paralyzed.

Eyes paralyzed open as your fingers shake uncontrollably. Mind races in and out of reality trying to grab onto something that’s grounded. You can’t breathe so you fixate on not breathing, gasping for air making it inevitable to calm down. Face turns red and mind goes blank while you research a way to calm yourself down. It seems nothing is curable and you find yourself fixating on a problem long enough to believe it. Endless nights of worrying and hearing noises that keep you awake long enough for your alarm to go off. Being pressured in situations of confrontation makes you go numb. You cry for help but it seems the cries were only whispers to the darkness. This is anxiety and you, my love, are having an anxiety attack.

Having and anxiety attack can make your day unbearable to proceed. Any stress can be the trigger and you either sink or swim. It fluctuates on how severe it can get and you are always waiting like a monster under your bed to pull you under into the unknown. So, how do you get out of this? How can you pin point the trigger before it gets worse? Sometimes the trigger goes unknown and you just have to ride it out and hope it doesn’t last long enough to make you a wreck. I’ve had anxiety attacks and my first one I will never forget. I was in bed not breathing trying to breathe long enough to put myself to sleep. But, after my mind went there I couldn’t turn back. I walked to the hospital, waited for an hour, yelled at the doctor that I couldn’t breathe and was dying, and then ran out into the cold because there was no beds to treat me and I would have to keep waiting since my anxiety attack wasn’t as severe as the others conditions. I felt numb but knew I needed to wake up early for classes. So, I went home and was so exhausted from the chaos I fell right to sleep praying to god that I would wake the next day. Since that day, I started researching how to get out of my next anxiety attack.

So, here is some things I do that helps me when an anxiety attack arises.

1.) Try to stay calm and breathe normal without fixating on breathing. You can listen to your favorite music or watch you favorite tv show. You may feel the need to keep going but it will only get worse. So, stop, breathe, and put your mind onto something else besides your anxiety.

2.) Don’t put yourself in high stress situations that you know you will fail. If you don’t have a choice, once a problem or situation arises, breathe one long inhale and clear your mind before finding a solution. Don’t get upset or act on impulse. Repeat to yourself, “it will be okay,” and you will do everything you can to solve the problem. If it doesn’t go your way then just know you did everything you could do in that moment and be proud of yourself. Life is too short to become upset about minimal issues.

3.) Be brave. If you’re someone with confrontation anxiety just know where you stand and understand that not everyone is going to think the way you do, which is okay. Not everyone is going to like what you say but understand that you both are right in some ways and try to understand their point of view so it won’t leave you stressed. Take the good out of every bad situation and learn from it. Just know it’s only a conversation and not a confrontation. If you go into it knowing it will be a high stress situation than it most likely will be because you are already setting yourself up for that stress which will add more fuel to the fire.

4.) Try not to be alone. Once you’re alone your mind can do what it pleases. Find a group of friends who understands and let them know once you’re feeling an anxiety attack. People who understand are more likely to help ease your mind and will bring you out of that state.

These tips may not work for you and don’t worry, that’s okay. Try and find what works best for you. It’s a trial and error, but it will stop. The shaking will subside. The breathing will go back to normal. Red will melt away from your face. Your mind will be at rest. The issues that you thought were going to wreck your life will seem small and you, my love, you will be okay.